Episode 130: Chris Claremont’s SHREK

SOME
Body once told Luke and Devin to cover New Exiles, it was Luke. He regrets his choice. This week the other half of the Exiles – Sage, Morph and Cat Pryde go to a world where a prince wants to bone a dragon and it is just not great.

Universes and Comics Covered:

  • Earth-8396 – New Exiles #5-6

Check after the jump for the image gallery and notes!

New Exiles 5-6

Earth-8396

Writer – Chris Claremont, Pencils -Roberto Castro, Inks – Scott Hanna, Gary Martin,  Colors – Moose Baumann, Wil Quintana Letters – Simon Bowland

Morph and Cat watch Sage fighting her own inner demons that can somehow physically attack her but they get bored and decide to look at the computer that Cat has some innate skills with They see what looks like a world breaking in the distance and get fractured briefly into alternate versions of versions and are sucked into a portal. Meanwhile Sage is taking a bath, so take a drink – yes we’re stealing the game from Jay and Miles – and she hears them scream and jumps in as well – and at first I thought it was Psylocke, but nope.

Anyway, they fall through a portal, Cat appears in a princess dress she can’t escape, and Sage in only a skimpy towel hears something and they find several warriors attacking a dragon and a knight. Cat phases through it, saving it and the Morph also turns into a dragon and they attack and nude Sage also shows up to kick some butt and steal some clothes. They chase off the warriors and meet the knight Domenic and his lady dragon Marysal . He was supposed to kill the dragon but fell in love with her instead.

We cut to his mother the queen who is very angry and Domenic’s father the king is fine with them being happy but the Queen wants the dragon killed so a dude named Venger appears and he promises to kill the Exiles as well. They start heading to the dragon’s lair where Sage gets a worse outfit somehow and they try and figure out how to get home since they lack a Tallus and a way home so they decide to just go with the flow.

Meanwhile a wave of Kitty Prydes washes over Cat and she’s replaced with another Kitty who is a completely different race and Sage somehow unlocks telepathic abilities which – sure.

Meanwhile the knight and the dragon are arguing about parents.

Cat and Sage go out walking and talk to him and Cat is questioning Domenic’s love and Sage is getting frustrated. Sage thinks she sees a biplane when her Diana Fox persona appears to try and take over and she falls – and that’s when the Domenic’s phone is back in cell rang and he gets a bunch of messages, and we find out this is a more advanced world while the plane descends down towards them.

Back at the cave, Morph and Marysal. Morph tries to cheer her up by turning into a dragon and it turns out she speaks english and was messing with him – unaware that a sniper has her in her sights.

Meanwhile the other party has taken a helicopter back to the castle where he greets his parents. Sage is having problems with her uncontrollable telepathy and Cat is unaccustomed to being attractive which is weird and Domenic confronts his mother about trying to kill Marysal – who in the meantime is shot, Morph gets captured in a net by Venger but escapes and holds his own for a bit until Marysal flies off with Morph and Venger takes off in his bi-plane. Marysal and Morph crash into it, knocking it from the sky near the castle and Domenic runs to check on his love which the King sees. Sage and Morph both get beaten by Venger as he moves towards the dragon. Domenic tries to intercede and is easily beaten and when Venger throughs a knife at Marysal the king takes it instead. Domenic goes to attack Venger, but Venger grabs him so Sage moves to shoot him, wings him so he teleports away – and Morph asks why she didn’t kill him and she’s afraid she’s turning into something.

The King survived (somehow), and the Exiles are unsure of how to escape. The dragon also is transformed into an attractive blond human woman because sure? That’s some bullshit. Let him fuck the dragon.

And then the Exiles are returned to the Panoptichron by Sabretooth, Cat is back to normal, and she knew all about him because the computer had him listed as a team member.

Meanwhile Venger is found by the Hydra Sue Storm and recruited.

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